Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Intermission: Crux

I take a break from Bangkok, work, Awek Kuching and everything else to just sit down and take stock.

Things are moving. The universe is turning, and I find myself in some of the cogs, feeling the rotation.

In this pivot point, it is imperative that I remain open. My sights are clear - I know the kind of work I want to do, and how to do it.

I do not trust people, but I am surprised - pleasantly - at the kind of support I am getting. I know that the road ahead of me is rocky and filled with potholes, not to mention sand-sharks, but it is nice to see that not all battles are uphill.

In this transitional period - or in any period, period - I must remember to never be evil. I am the Lord of Destruction, and I know very well that within all types of evil lay all manner of seeds - the seeds of destruction.

I was insecure about my intelligence, so I observed what is smart and what is stupid. Evil is never smart, because it always gets back at you. Evil is something that traps everything in a whirlpool of despair.

And I do not believe that we are great because of machines, tools or how we say that we are great. To be the greatest, you simply be the greatest. To be the best, you be the best.

A lot of people are afraid. Afraid of failing, afraid of being laughed at, of being rejected.

I stand here, a reject. A failure. I have failed at everything, I have been rejected by everyone. Laughed at, sometimes by 'friends'. Is there anything else left for any of you humans to do?

You are afraid of being measured, and coming up short? I have been measured, and I was short, long, big, thin, fat, late, early. I don't give a flying fuck.

My God is not mortal. I do not worship mankind or the voices of others. I will go forward, with or without anyone or anything. I am the best simply because I decided to be the best. A long time ago. And I am not turning or even looking back because I am fucking busy.

There's no pretense or whatever the fuck. I am the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be.

I've been to Bangkok, and no power in the universe can stop me now.